At least, that’s what the doctors keep telling me.  Actually, they haven’t gone so far as to say “nothing”… but they’re completely flummoxed as to what IS wrong with me.

Here’s the deal.  Beginning on my daughter’s birthday (April 11), I noticed that my left foot was swollen.  Really, really swollen.  Which was kind of bizarre, because it didn’t hurt.  I couldn’t remember having injured it in any way.  But there it was, swelled so that my ankle spilled over the top of my shoe.  So, I took myself to the Doc-In-A-Box.  Since then I’ve also been to an internist, a vascular specialist, and the ER.  I’ve spent a fortune on co-pays.  I’ve been prescribed two different diuretics in three different strengths.  It’s been six weeks now. Here’s what I DON’T have:

I don’t have congestive heart disease; blood clots; or vascular blockages from plaque, cholesterol, or other sources.  The problem is not coronary, pulmonary, or vascular.  I don’t have diabetes.  My thyroid gland is working perfectly, as are my kidneys and my liver.  In fact, if you look at my bloodwork, you would call me extraordinarily healthy.  Everything is “within normal limits”.

Well, everything except my feet are blown up like freakish balloons.  My boss has described them as “cartoon feet”.  They look like they belong to Fred Flintstone.  The swelling actually goes about 2/3 up my calf.  Once upon a time I had nice legs.  I’ve even been told that I had exceptionally nice legs.  Now, I have “cankles“.  EWWW!  And the skin is sore from being stretched.

I have a follow-up appointment with my internist on the 28th.  Maybe he’ll have some fresh ideas.